Dear Creative #1

Dear Creative, what if I asked the question, How are you? What would be your reply? Would you say something like, “fine” or “all good” or “not bad’” a standard socially acceptable reply where both parties welcome an exchange that doesn’t expect connection.

So, I’m going to ask the question:

How are you? No, really. How are you?

Yes, I understand that sometimes you need to say, “I’m fine,” and move on, we all do that. But also allow yourself to connect occasionally. We need to connect, you need connection.

I was watching Queer Eye on Netflix the other day, and a person on the show said, “it’s easier to exist than live.” It struck me. Sometimes I admit I do just exist. I go through the motions, I don’t look up at people and smile when passing, I don’t give the supermarket checkout person eye contact. I just go through my day unconnected, distracted, caught up in the past and worried about the future.

Sound familiar?

But it’s OK. Just stop for a moment. Take a breathe. Feel your feet on the ground, just be present for this moment.

Taken on a early morning walk

What are you going through right now? Sickness? Busy with work and family? Mental health? Financial difficulties? A feeling of isolation? Maybe you haven’t had anytime to be creative? Maybe being creative is just so off your radar right now.

And that’s OK. Just stop. Take a breathe.

Standing in ourselves is difficult to do. being aware of our surroundings, connecting with people we love and with strangers takes effort. But it’s worth it.

If you haven’t been able to connect, try to challenge yourself today. Send a text to a friend you haven’t heard from in a while. If you are feeling more brave, make time to visit or meet up. And, when they ask you that… question. “How are you?” Dig a little deeper. Make a connection.

Let me know in the comments below how you enjoy connecting with others.

Catch you next time xx

December Diary: 2021 Day 13-15

Yep I’ve missed a couple of days blogging, but you get that. It has been so crazy at work finishing up for the year. I suddenly realised I had so many small things to round up before I could sign off for the holidays that my days and nights have been packed.

But such is life.

Tomorrow – will hopefully be my last day. I’m extremely fortunate to be able to take time off work, I know so many people can’t, so even though I’m busy and tired I am full of gratitude.

Coming to the end of a year is always a good time to reflect, and I think more than ever I have some big aspects of my life to reflect on. I know a lot of people are saying things like this more than ever and I wonder if COVID 19 have affected us in a different type of way than say just socially or financially – but also philosophically. I feel like I’m asking bigger or deeper questions of myself than I have before. Not just reflecting on my year – but reflecting on my values.

I made a short YouTube clip on this which you can watch here. But it really is saying the same thing in a different way, trying to formulate a new way of thinking about how and why I make some of the decisions I do – and if those decisions are still serving me.

Anyway that is all I have today. I will write again tomorrow. The photo below is of Tāmaki Makaurau Auckland. We went for an evening walk after dinner and this is our view. How grateful am I.

Catch you tomorrow xx

December Diary: 2021 Day Eleven – The Visitor

It’s been an interesting day – a Saturday. We headed out early to our favourite beach in Tāmaki Makaurau Auckland, I’ve blogged about this beach so many times, and I never get tired of it. But this time we came from across the city as we have moved away from the area.

If you haven’t been reading, we moved last Saturday – it’s been a week, so it was different re-visiting a place, this beach, that use to be a 5 min drive down the road. It’s not like we will be strangers to this beach, we will visit a lot, but as visitors and not as locals.

I wonder where the boundary between being a local and a visitor change? I live in the same city, but if there was traffic, my ‘visit’, the round trip, could take over 3 hours, possibly 4.

My new ‘locals’ are all new, the ‘local’ food market, the ‘local’ chemist, the ‘local’ book shop, they all need to be visited for the first time, and then a relationship with myself and these new spaces need to be formed.

A Beautiful Saturday Morning

As I walked along Cornwallis beach, it felt different. It also felt the same, maybe I was different, I had already left, my attunement for ‘local’ was somewhere else.

During the last week in our new neighbourhood I have been on many walks. Trying to familiarise myself with the ins and outs, the street corners, the curiosities or this new ‘local’ environment. So coming back to Cornwallis was like a breath in of the familiar, I didn’t need to look around, or try to decipher new information, I relaxed in having been there many times before, there was something inherently peaceful about ‘sameness’. But I also felt that my relationship with the place was changed. I will now always be a visitor.

But a happy visitor – so that is something.

Let me know in the comments below your experience of shifting or travel, I find thinking about spaces/places a very interesting topic.

Catch you tomorrow xx

December Diary: 2021 Day Six

Hi, I hope you are well.

After work I decided to sew a book. I know, a bit random but I wanted to do something creative that wasn’t painting or drawing or filming or writing…. hahaha

Sewing a book together seemed like something I could do. First I rounded up all sorts of paper and folded 2 signatures of 6 A2 folded over, which gives me 24 pages for each signature. I then made 3 simple stitches. Once that was done I created a cover and sewed the 2 signatures in. I’ve never done this before, I simply made it up as I went along – but it has worked out well so far.

Just to finish off the sewing, I tapped down parts where I put the stitches through to strengthen the binding. Once that was all done, I went about adding paper to some of the pages – glueing in these, just where I thought it needed it.

Pic of the day: Journal so far, will take a final one tomorrow

I still want to do some decorating on the front cover, and put pockets into the back cover, but I need to let the whole journal dry. So, I’ll finish it off after work tomorrow. I’m also thinking of making a second one for a Christmas present. It will be nice to give someone a handmade gift.

Gratitude

I’m grateful for creativity. It was a very difficult day at work, but knowing that I had time to do some creating after work made everything OK.

That’s it for today –

Will write again tomorrow. Catch you then xx

December Diary: 2021 Day Five

Well we have arrived. We are now in the new apartment. Shifted.

And, the unpacking begins.

It’s an interesting task to unpack, find new places for old items. I have this horrible habit of saying to myself, “I’ll stick this here for now…” and in my mind I’m thinking “one day I will find a better place for it”. But will that day happen? Or will that item be always in a new location that doesn’t quite suit?

As I have said in previous diary entrees we have down-sized, and we did get rid of a lot of stuff – but “oh my word”, I still have so much. Maybe I need a second round. It is surprising how much stuff I don’t need. This time I have given away a lot of items I use to feel sentimentally about – but it just does not serve to keep them – so I have said goodbye.

Change is exciting, it’s also daunting but I think in the end it keeps us resilient. We need to keep changing, adapting and allow ourselves to face new obstacles. Part of moving into this apartment is to face new challenges and ask of myself to: ‘begin again’.

Pic of the day: I saw this in a cafe today and had to share.

Gratitude

I am grateful for good coffee. Sounds superficial, but today it was awesome!

Catch you tomorrow xx

December Diary: 2021 Day Four

I am an artist. I am creative. Isn’t that good to say, out loud. Just say it.

Even if you don’t think that about yourself. Say it anyway. Out loud! “I am an artist.” Because we are all artists. We might not be painters or illustrators or potters but we are artful, we all create. And so we should celebrate.

Pic of the day: This is a book title by Bob and Roberta Smith

Being artful, means you ‘think’ creatively, you let yourself explore, be curious, be playful with ideas.

If you, for some reason, have become stuck in routine or are feeling melancholy or perhaps things feel overwhelming this is where being artful can spark a fresh angle on life. It can be a simple as getting out of bed on the other side, taking a different route to work or having lunch in the park instead of the office.

Being artful suggests play. And play opens our mind to seeing the world a-new. Just try it.

I believe that we experience life the way we view it. Meaning if we view life as meaningless, or negatively we will experience life in that way. However, if we see life playfully, if life is a curious and full of possibilities then we will experience life more positively. I suffer from depression and I know what it means to think about life negativity but one of my greatest assets is the ability to play.

Playfulness could be difficult if you are not use to it. I would start with identifying something in your life that you feel is negative or not how you would like it to be and imagine it differently. Start small. Maybe your cubicle at work is depressing you. How could you transform it. Think of what a cubicle would look like from the keyboards perspective, think of a cubicle floating in space, think of a hit song titled “The Magic Cubicle”. Sound weird? Good. Think about it differently, have fun in your mind. Now think about how you can make it a beautiful space to work in.

There is no end to play, no one can take your imagination away. It’s all yours.

Just following on from yesterday. It is our shift day, and as I write this the movers are here with our carefully packed boxes. I’m sitting in the car keeping out of their way. Our possessions at the moment are in a truck. It’s a very odd feeling and I will be glad when the boxes are loaded into the new place.

Grateful

I am grateful we have been able to afford movers this time. Shifting house is super stressful and having people to assist is such a blessing. I am very fortunate.

Hope you are all well.

Catch you tomorrow xx and remember to PLAY

December Diary: 2021 Day Three

It is the last night in our house before the shifters arrive tomorrow. It’s been pretty hectic getting packed up and ready to move while being in ‘lock-down’ and working pretty much full-time. But such is life, can’t complain. Actually I’m extremely grateful.

Tomorrow brings a new chapter.

A fresh start. Change. Movement.

As I said in the last couple of posts, the apartment is smaller than our current situation and it has been the best time to get rid of unwanted, unused, stuff and think about what new items we will bring into our lives. I think we will be much more intentional this time around.

I have two more weeks of work, and then I’m off for a month to enjoy the holidays with family and a much needed rest. I truely believe this year has been my hardest. So much has happened, and I’m not even talking about the pandemic. During my time off I want to reflect on my YouTube channel. Re-think how I am putting myself out there.

As an audience member of YouTube, I know what I enjoy and why it brings value to my experience of engaging with online content, but it is very difficult to create it. Ha ha – but I love doing it, so keep on keeping on.

Pic of the Day: Early morning walk at Cornwallis Beach this morning.

Gratitude

I’m thankful for the sunshine today. It popped in and out of the clouds all day and seemed to be there when I needed it most. I find that sunshine is so critical to my mental health.

Hope you are all well.

Catch you tomorrow xx

At The Horizon

Finally we are here. The interactive poetical documentary ‘At The Horizon’ is online and free to view for two weeks, from 25 November till 8 December 2021.

To view click here

Installation of ‘At The Horizon” at RM Gallery 2020

I want to point out that for viewing reasons the interaction is much better on a desktop, laptop or tablet. It is not made for phone viewing, so you may encounter glitches if you watch from there.

I first started thinking about the documentary in 2016 and this is when I interviewed my mother, and from that point the idea of ‘At The Horizon’ unfolded. I finished the work late 2020 and it had its debut at RM gallery in Tāmaki Makaurau Auckland, since then, however, and due to continuing lockdowns, the work has not been able to have public viewings. It is this reason that I have put the work online, holding my own exhibition if you will.

So Please go to the website and check it out. Then let me know down below, or feel free to ask questions.

Putting Myself “out there”.

Hi everyone, I hope you are all well.

I’m contemplating, reflecting on the feeling or experience of “putting myself out there”, sharing online, writing this Blog and recently starting a YouTube channel.

It’s difficult, amazing, fun, hard, and very humbling. It’s humbling because part of me wants or needs success, and I’m told that success is measured in views and reads: the more subscribers, the more engagement, click-throughs… and so on. Numbers measure how successful I am.

But on reflection…

That’s not why I started these things. I get caught up in posts like “How to grow your channel”, and I forget that I started it for fun, to share, to grow and to challenge myself.

I’ve been treating myself to cut flowers once a week

So, I have given myself a reality check. If I want to keep going, I need to remind myself that success comes from within, not externally.

Success – gets the best of us. It questions our own beliefs, makes us feel not good enough, makes us compare – and I don’t want to be part of that.

My creativity and the way I share is mine. I don’t have to follow a formula or pattern that someone says makes a successful blog of vlog…

I’m going to be strong, and do what I want – because that is valid. What and how I want to share isn’t measured in numbers.

That’s me this week. I little wake-up call. Standing up for myself, being my best friend, listening to my own advice.

If you want to know what I think more extensively on the topic, I’ve written a 2 part blog on success: linked below:

Success Part One

Success Part Two

Put yourself out there, share if you want to, but choose your own success.

Catch you next time.

NAVIGATING CHANGE – through the creative process

I’ve made a YouTube video about this, about what I’m going through and how I’m adjusting to change and preparing for change. Things we need to think about, plan and put into action.

For more on this please click here

I think change is one of the hardest aspects of life, but also one of the most essential, we can’t allow ourselves to stagnate, we need change, we need to move forward, we need to take risks and be brave. The quote below is exactly how I feel about it. Don’t fester on the things you are letting go or saying goodbye to, but face forward.

The secret of change is to focus all of your energy not on fighting the old, but on building the new” 

Socrates

Short but sweet this week. It’s all in the video so check it out.

Catch you next week xx